I told him how I feel.
It’s something that hasn’t gone away or really changed much except to mature as we have over the last five years. This sense of rightness where he is concerned has been the most consistent thing about me since junior year of high school. I’m going to be with him soon. ‘With him.’ Not sure what that means but we’ve said we’re going to spend a lot of time together this summer and see what happens. Waiting since that night in December when I thought he was going to kiss me after a Nerf gun fight in the dark. But I wasn’t ready, so I turned on his bedroom light instead and just said good night. I broke the moment where he kept staring at me like he was seeing me for the first time. Maybe he was. Waiting through text messages and weekly phone calls and emails and Facebook wall posts. Waiting through the night in the hotel lobby when I tested the waters by telling the truth with a laugh in my voice and he put his arm around me teasingly but didn’t take it back after the joke had passed.